7/01/06 - Tomorrow's Ritual

tomorrow, after our amazonian shamans go to watch the soccer game in the morning, is our ayahuasca ritual.

I have not met the brazilians yet, but they are here on our land now. I had an intense meeting with Kutira preparing me for tomorrow's ritual. She asked me if I was ready to accept the responsibility of reckoning with all that I will envision, dark or light. She expressed that she was protective of me because of my youth, which I thought was trivial, since everyone else is in their mid-twenties and I am only a few years younger (and in many ways, years older).

A few rules: we, the students, must wear all white robes that cover most of our skin. We cannot make eye contact with anyone of the opposite sex because the ayahuasca is an intensely solitary venture and any potential sexual energies will disrupt the balance of the ceremony. We cannot tie up our hair for energy reasons. And we cannot cross our legs a certain way, either (lotus position ok). When the shamans ask us questions, we have to answer a certain way. The only time we make eye contact with the shaman is when he looks into our eyes to determine how much of the ayahuasca to pour into our cup. We must drink every drop, because it is holy to them and an insult if we do not do so. We will be drinking the ayahuasca three or four times throughout the day. The ceremony is eight hours long.

We have each been assigned a spiritual guide to help us throughout the ritual. Our guides will be wearing all blue. The ritual will be held at the dharma center, and there is a therapy room for both men and women respectively, should the need arise (in other words, should the trip be intensely bad).

There is an almost complete possibility that vomiting will occur. I don't think I have a clear concept of the intensity of the ayahuasca ritual, but I think it is best to go into it with an open heart and mind and no negative thoughts. I have nothing but innocent intentions for this spiritual journey.

I am a little sad that I will not be going on the hike with Daniel through the bamboo forest, which I hear is quite intense and beautiful, and dead-ends at the waterfall. But participating in this ritual is certainly a once in a lifetime opportunity. Perhaps he will want to go tomorrow.

Kutira wants Tenzen, her adopted Tibetan son and I to collaborate on a comic describing the internship for future students here. I admit it's a little hard to explain the set-up: for those unfamiliar, those who come to work here agree to work 23 hours a week on the land, either building temples or gardening, or housework in exchange for living here (we each have our own temple) and for our education in taoist tantra, courtesy of Rafael and Kutira, our mentors.

It is worth every drop of sweat. Papayas and bananas and coconuts fall at our feet, food is cheap, the people are lovely, and this place is a sacred home for anyone who steps foot here. It is, in every sense of the word, paradise.

Good blessings come to everyone who steps foot on Maui. I can't think of a better place or circumstance for this intense experience I am about to have. Wish me well friends. So much love.