8/7/06 - The Good Work

I've been pretty bad about updating the blog, but I suppose that's what happens when everything is hectic and things are in flux in a way that makes you think of tall, strong deep blue waves crashing against the lava rock chests of this island.

What kind of adventures have I been having? I suppose the point is that I have been having adventures.

The energy of the crew has shifted. Amanda, Willem and I are all planning on leaving the island at the end of this month. Willem is going back to Germany to be with family, and then to Spain. Amanda is stopping by L.A. to work for a while and re-acclimate to mainland life, and then on to Texas to meet up with a guy named 'Catfish' to learn how to basejump. She'd been recruited by one of the guests, on the of the few professional basejumpers in the world.

My plan? It's still up in the air, but it won't be long before it falls to the earth in the proper configuration. Still corresponding with Oleg the Russian, and his colleagues. Today he sent me the details of the apartment I may be staying in. I'll keep you updated.

Point being, everything is changing. For a while, there was a lull as we began to refer to our beloved Maui in the past tense. Then Nick came to the land, our coi pond expert from Austin, and we were delighted to see the island again for the first time through a fresh pair of eyes, political unrest at the Little Beach, surfers in Pa'ia, Hedonism at LeFleur's... the whole thing.

It seems like the island is giving us a crash course in reconsidering 'normal' life. Things gradually floating back into 'reality' (and I say this in quotes because this has all been so very real... and now we must depart... if anything, just to see what this gorgeousness looks like from 'over there'.)

Paradise life is just that. Life in paradise. But Amanda and I have learned so much in our lives, and we've gathered skills along the way- not only do we have ideas, but we have the intelligence, resourcefulness, integrity and spiritual strength to do the Good Work... to do anything, really. It goes to follow that we feel a sense of duty, of obligation to our world to continue onward- but we will always keep Maui in our hearts, someday to return to it when the time is right.

Nick read my Tarot cards, which is always an interesting experience. I love the meaning in it; tarot never really tells you exactly anything about the past, present or future. Instead, it redirects your awareness toward recognizing certain trends, and I came upon the realization that working Boston, while it will be a difficult transition, and most likely unpleasant, is part of my contribution to the Good Work. I will learn so much. Most of my uncertainty is gone regarding which decision to make (I had recently been considering continuing west, unsure about which path would be more of a learning experience)

So where was my head going... I was explaining to Nick and Amanda that I am reborn, into something. Have I fully blossomed yet? Who knows, I didn't even know I could become who I am.

I am becoming all that I am

I should be more careful with my words. Different words mean different things to different people. This is something I'll learn when I return to the mainland.

It's hard to keep your mind in the present when the future is so near.

I'll meditate on that. Our spiritual retreat starts on August 18 and goes 8 hours a day for a week. In the end, we will swim with the dolphins. Kutira calls them on her didjeridoo. I wish I could explain how much stronger, and aware and capable I feel now, but I just feel it, and you will too, when I finally get a chance to give you a hug. I feel like I've lived generations of lifetimes of wisdom. I have learned so much.

I think about what it will feel like, going from loving, warm, inviting Maui Paradise to cold, harsh, grey, office-ey Boston. I think about what happens when you put a cold glass into boiling water (it shatters, yes?). But then I think about tempered glass, that magical stuff. It has been fortified, and it is made to withstand the pressure of millions of surprised molecules running fullstop into each other.

I'll make it just fine. I'd be like the world's first scuba diver, surprised at my buoyancy and sustainance in such an unfamiliar territory, and faced with challenge of moving my legs a certain way, of breathing a certain way, and of looking all around me for sharks.

Sounds like an adventure to me.